The sweetest grass

I think my family and friends may be sick of hearing me say how happy I am not to be working! I can't help it every day I wake up and feel this incredible relief that I don't have to go to work today. I learned so much form my job, I can't regret going to work.

One of the best things that I learned was that I'm smart, I'm competent, I'm strong and I can do anything I set my mind to. I don't know if anyone except a stay at home mother can truly understand this, but after years of being home, first with babies, then toddlers and young children and finally the grueling years of raising teenagers (especially teen girls!) a woman begins to lose herself. She loses her identity. she becomes ONLY a mother, only a wife, only a housekeeper. It doesn't happen the first year or the 5th year, it happens gradually over time. Piece by piece she sacrifices her wants, her dreams, her hopes and goals to help her husband reach his dreams, to achieve his goals. She gives up her wants, even sacrifices her needs to provide opportunities for her children, all the things she used to plan and dream about gets lost in the day to day care of house, husband, kids, bills, laundry, and groceries. Until one day she wakes up and her children aren't children anymore, she's bored with cooking the same dinners, washing the same dishes, sweeping the same floors, and she doesn't even remember who she is. Or at least I did. I felt that way.

I made the decision to get a job and it did so much for me! It gave me a confidence I've never really had. It taught me so much about myself and my family. And in the last year or so I began to remember who I am, and maybe I changed some too. I'd like to believe I've grown, changed matured. I truly do believe I can do great things! Big things! I used to think this is it, all my life will ever be. My whole perspective is different now, I think I can do anything, literally choose anything!

Really think about that. The possibilities, because it's the same for all of us. If we could just see the possibilities! What could we do? If we let ourselves really dream? Dream big? For me, I could go to college, write a book, take a trip.  I could get another job, learn a new language or take a mission trip. What could you do?

I've always heard the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, but honestly, I think once you taste the grass over there sometimes you realize how sweet the grass is on your own side of the fence. And right now, at this moment, I'm so happy to be here on my little side of the fence.